Nightmares

Nightmares can not only be disruptive to a child’s sleep but can be very distressing and disruptive to sleep.

Many children will experience nightmares, night terrors and night waking at some point in their life.

No child wants to have a nightmare. The can be quite scary for them.

A child doesn’t necessarily have the life skills or knowledge to know how to deal with and process nightmares.

Generally, most children will outgrow them.

A nightmare is quite stressful and upsetting to the child.

When a child has a nightmare they need our help and support to cope with the nightmare and deal with their feelings.

Unfortunately, nightmares are not only quite common and normal, but can occur quite often.

At least one quarter of children in early childhood have at least one per week.

We can all have bad dream. We aren’t talking about a bad dream.

Nightmares that can occur between 2-6 years.

Nightmares are generally said to decrease after this age as it is then that children are able to understand their world, express themselves and master or communicate their fears better.

They most often seem to occur between 2 am and early morning.

Once a child has had a nightmare it is then often difficult for them to go back to sleep.

Nightmares tend to occur in children who are not getting enough sleep or overtired.

Like with children themselves, the reasons are individual and many.

They generally are attributed to an active imagination, a limited or inability to express themselves clearly, or changes or upheavals in their life.

This includes all the usual changes on a day-to-day basis that children encounter, traumatic events etc.

While if your child does have nightmares it is not pleasant, it is often because they are using their mind to make sense/understand/cope with their world or life.

There have been many positives that have come out of a nightmare, as it indicates we are attempting to deal with the fear, situation, event, etc.

Nightmares can offer you an insight into your child.

• Listen
• Don’t make fun of or ridicule
• Empathize but don’t be condescending
• Support
• Help them in making sense of the concerns or underlying factors
• Comfort – a negative of nightmares is the feeling after having one (insecurity, fear, etc.)
• Re-assure them that you are there, especially if they have a fear of the nightmare recurring
• Don’t try to brush it aside and tell them to lie down and go back to sleep or not to think about it
• Let them talk about it
• Talking together about the dream can help them to make sense of it, but not always, as they may be scared and not comfortable to. It’s OK if they prefer not to.
• You don’t need to interpret them all but seek professional help if the nightmares are persistent, especially if you cannot pinpoint an underlying reason/event that may be the cause. This can be to us quite simple, such as moving house, but to the child quite stressful and can be a trigger. Also, if they are affecting their waking hours. A good idea if they do seem to be having more frequent nightmares is to keep a diary. This will help you to see if there is a pattern or trigger and will help a professional.

Note: nightmares can sometimes be caused by an illness or high fever.

• Have a consistent bed time and bedtime routine.
• Avoid TV programs that are scary or inappropriate.
• Limit the amount of energy releasing near bed-time or over-excitement.
• Avoid over tiredness.
• Avoid complete darkness, this can help their imagination/perception of unseen things in the dark.
• Reassure, comfort. Let them know and feel they are safe.
• Stay with them until they are either calm or asleep, let them guide you.
• Reassure them everyone gets scared or has bad dreams sometimes.
• Have realistic expectations.
• Be calm, gentle in your response.
• Be consistent in your support.