Constant running off

Some children are children who constantly seem to make a bolt for it.

Often there may be reasons why a child seems to constantly be running off.

Sometimes the motive is easily identifiable other times it is not.

Identification may or may not be straightforward.

It may as simple as a child would prefer to walk than be in the pram. If a child can’t verbalise this or if they know they are being placed there even if they struggle it may be the natural choice for the child to try to run off before you try to place them in the pram.

Other times it can be harder to identify the reason behind it.

Regardless of if there is a link to the running off of not it can both stressful and unsafe.

Generally there is not intent for the child’s behaviour.

The child is not trying to be intentionally difficult.

Often it is a sign of the child trying to assert their independence.

Rarely there is a more dire underlying cause.

It is important to have strategies if you find that your child is constantly running off (or trying to).

Establishing rules, boundaries and consistency is the key.

A defined rule could be we always hold hands when crossing the road.

Enforce this at all times.

If you relax the rules, even on one occasion, a child may consider that this is the new limit. Previous effort and progress will be lost.

The child will consequently be more likely to test the boundaries more regularly and in the future.

• Explain why they need to do what it is you are asking. Talk with and remind the child about the rules. Do this before you are in the position to have them run off. So for example in the car as you have stopped to go to the park, before you get out talk about what you expect and what the consequences are.
• Make sure you stay close. This is not to make it a game or to allow your child to run off but it ensures that if they do then you are close by. It reduces the need to yell or run after them. Sometimes the behaviour can be nipped in the bud. It is important it does not become a game for the child.
• Establish a system and ways you would like things done. The earlier this is established the more positive the outcome. Make it part of the routine. Children won’t question it or try to push the limits.
• All children at times will try to push the limits. Remain calm. The calmer you remain, or appear in dealing with the behaviour the better the outcome. Re-directing or distractions are helpful. Distraction is effective. This reduces the opportunity for the child to run off.
• Keeping a child busy and interacting with them will keep them too busy to want to run off.
• Talk with the constant run off child. Help the child make some rules (age appropriate) to give them some ownership. This may alleviate the running off.
• Give praise if they have done a good job at something. Encourage them if they are doing well and praising a child’s behaviour goes a long way. Acknowledging their efforts is important. It will make them feel noticed and valued and help them to want to do it more often.
• Engaged the child. A busy and interested child is less likely to attempt to run off. Tasks or errand’s are important. To a child they can be boring. Keep them busy and engaged. The jobs will be done quicker and effortlessly. It will be a positive experience.
• Remove the temptation to run off before they get the chance. Place the child in the trolley, use a pram or not take the child if it is possible. A toy or a snack can keep them busy while in the trolley/pram, etc.
• Read books about safety and running away and talk with them.