Routines

We can’t follow a perfect routine all the time nor should we overall a routine is beneficial.

We all need to accept that on some evenings, the kids will go to bed too late and we will eat junk food and the house will be a complete shambles.

Although, while sometimes things don’t go as we would like a routine is important. However, flexibility to the day and time is just as important.

There is no point in trying to ‘enforce’ a rigid routine.

Some days besides our best efforts things don’t go to plan.

Things are either out of your control or need to be slightly different to accommodate what is happening on the day.

It is a smoother household if the child/ren has some idea of what to expect, what happens within the house and the best way to achieve this is with a consistent routine. For example you generally find that bedtimes are easier if you have a bedtime routine such as dinner, bath story and then bed.

Children need stability and consistency in their life, a good routine will provide them with this and the understanding of what to expect during the day.

That is not to say that everyday must be the same but in terms of the basics of the day, such as the meals, sleep and so on then the more they remain the same or similar on a day to day basis then the more content a child will be and the more you will find that they are settled.

It is recommended that as soon as you can get into a routine the better and this is then transcends right throughout their childhood.

Once a routine is set into place then as a by-product the stress and ‘effort’ of the day to day tasks is reduced, such as the washing , cleaning etc is easier to keep on top of as there is order to the day and the household.

• Routines guide positive behaviour.
• They help children with transitions. So if you find that your child is having trouble with the transition to bed for example then having a consistent calm bed time routine can assist the transition and provide the child with the information to know the process.
• Routines give children a sense of security and helps them develop self-discipline.
• It helps with changes. Change is a part of childhood but a routine will indeed help a child adjust as they are more likely to be able to handle change if it is expected and occurs in the context of a familiar routine.
• Routines provide structure and teaches kids how to constructively control themselves and their environments.
• Routines eliminate power struggles.
• They help kids cooperate.
• It reduces stress and anxiety.
• Provides for a better a relationship with you and your child.
• Helps children learn independence and take ownership of their activities. As the routine consistency continues the child will then start to take ownership such as remembering to brush their own teeth before bed, etc.
• Helps children learn the concepts such as looking forward.
• Helps them fall asleep easier, listen better, attend to meals more, etc.
• Routines help to maintain consistency and expectations.
• They provide comfort and a sense of safety to young children.

The short answer is no!

Although it is not as simple as a yes or no answer. It does go a bit deeper.

Whilst we have discussed the importance and the benefits of a routine, it is just not possible or recommended to try to ‘get’ a baby into a routine.

A infant will tell us what they need as the negotiate their new world.

They tell us when they are hungry, when they are tired and so on. We can learn to read the signs such as a tired baby and attend to that but getting a baby into a routine is pointlessly impossible.

Forcing an infant to accommodate to our routine is not responsive parenting not to mention that it just adds more stress to both you and your baby.

Eventually a baby will establish their own routine and settle into a schedule.

We can help by ensuring that we structure the day around their needs, for example, providing conditions that are appropriate for their nap at the time they usually sleep and by being consistent in the routine times such as bathing.

Having a consistent bath or bed routine for example will assist in establishing a routine  as they grow as it is familiar.